VelvetDarkRocks's game Reviews on Newgrounds

[Thesaurus of Masturbation]

I saw the preloader and thought hm......... Hm indeed. An entire thesauras on masturbating, well I'll be damned. It was just way too long though, I stopped reading at B, but yeah it was actually pretty funny. Mm, good job I guess.

~VelvetDarkRocks~

eddiebalin responds:

You say "way too long"?

Chicks say that about my penis.

;oP

[Funkey Town]

Hey, didn't watch it, but it's by you, so I just thought it'd be nifty to be the first person to review in nearly a year, so yay!

But you know, you could just upload the finished version in this movie's place.

~VelvetDarkRocks~

[Spank him]

Lol! Interesting concept, but fun and cute. Takes about 1 second to download, and is fun for the minute it gives you. Bah, I don't know how that last guy got so high, must've put the sensitivity way up. I got around 200. Original and entertaining. Good work!

~VelvetDarkRocks~

[Dante's Optical illusions]

Just like Cosmetor said, I'm so grateful this wasn't a "Look at the screen and be scared after 3 seconds" screamer flash. Very well done, and thanks for making the effort of collecting these, and nice music to go with it. The name made me watch it, though I've not done such a thing in weeks. Congratulations on actually making me WATCH a random portal entry! For that, i give you 5 good sir. Have a nice day!

[Tip-A-Cow]

Wow! That was actualy fun! Rather pointless, but my brother now believes he is "The One Cow-Tipper". I think you're a bad influence :P

Cool scenes at the beginning and end, but there's not really alot to say after that. Nice sound effects, cool music and menu, and always cool background. This is quite a nifty little game! Love the way he dances, and especially when he comes back to kick the demon cow. Heh heh, great work with this one. For one and a half months, it certainly turned out very well.

PS: For those of you who can't win, get someone in your family to press one arrow button and you press the other. It's a cinche, but if you either don't have any family, or you're just too half-assed, type in "gotmilk" at the password screen. Don't use it until you're about to quit, which you'll pretty much do 'neways.

~VelvetDarkRocks~

AngryAxel responds:

Wow, a whole lot of praises! Thanx! And I glad your brother thinks that, just make sure that he doesn't actually go out and try to tip cows :P

Some people says that it's impossible, unfortunately... They'll just be mad and stomp you 'til youre dead. Well, probably not, but that's what you can tell your brother ^_^

and thanx again for the review and tips for beating the game! And you can just bash your hand against the two arrow buttons at the same time, or switch off Num lock and bash <-, ->, 4 and 6 at the same time! Wohoo, huge progress! Thanx!

[SpongeBob SquarePants V2]

I really like the detail of your graphics! You drew each character perfectly, and I could almost here Spongebob when Mr Crab asked for the suitcase. I sitll haven't figured out how to do any other missions or to even pass the first one, but I'll find out eventually.

And the Jellyfish Catching was pretty pointless, but I still like it how you used all the characters really well. Good job on this one,

~VelvetDarkRocks~

Oh, and by the way. They're called crabby patties not crab burgers.

[! Fishy !]

Absolutely fantastic! Once again you have proved the most addictive and creative game maker ever. Truly magnificent! Perfect aquatic music, never got tired of it, and just the whole concept of the food chain was wonderful! Well, until oyu hit the 85 000's and killed every fish there was. An occassional shark would've been a good idea, but the only problem was the fish moved in a straight line. That was a bit too easy (I"m not saying it wasn't hard!) Normal fish would've gone for the smaller fish, and the smaller fish would've fled from the bigger fish, but hey. This is flash, and it's still a wonderful game! Ah the simplicity, absolutely fantastic. With each game you produce I like you more and more. I very much look forward to seeing your next work of art!

~VelvetDarkRocks~

[Madness interactive]

I must admit, this is possibly one of the greatest games on newgrounds. Definitely one of the most fun and addictive, and definitely on my favourites list. Nice choice with the weapons. Great range, and it was a little too different from Madness Redeemer and Madness Combat then I would have liked. In both of them, he pretty much bashed his way through and always had a few starting weapons other than the ones he picked up, and whenever I play a game (especially one based on a movie) I try and make it as real as possible. Great work on thi, though I disapprove having infinite lives. There seemed too many guys and too few chances to kill them all. The bullet time was cool, 'cept I could only kill about 5 guys in the time I had. It would have been nice if that was a cheat. It probably is, but I haven't uncovered it yet. Anyway. Great similarities, except there seemed too much a variety with the characters. I guess it would be boring without it though. Nah. It was a good idea. The controls took me a while to get, and it takes a bit of time to master, but once you've got the controls, you've got the game. It just takes practise. And I didn't know it was possible to kill Jesus so I quit. The second time round I was practising aiming in slowmo and he fell dead which suprised me. And what suprised me even more was the ultra easy ending, though the sheriff made me crack up. Overall, a quality game that you could spend hours on. And I did, and now my homework is going to be overdue. Great stuff.

~VelvetDarkRocks~

[Xiao Xiao No. 4]

Great work, but not really worth the loading time. It takes unsually long, even on my computer. Three megabite games would load faster than this, and it's only 2 megabites. I wonder why that is...

Nice work with the colourless backgrounds. The way the 'camera' moves is fantastic with some excellent detail and 3D effects. The different ways the stickmen can die is also a effect to the gameplay. It was also a good idea to be able to reload slightly before you were out, but it would have been better if you could reload whenever you wanted, so you didn't have to shoot at nothing to get a full barrel. As far as I can see, there wasn't much of a point to this -nor any of your other movies/games at that- but it was very entertaining all the same. Some different endings would have been nice though. Maybe depending on what difficulty you passed on, or how much health you had when you got up to the boss, or even better. Both! And maybe instead of merely gaining points from killing people, you could get one or two points more for shooting them in the head etcetera, and lose points for missing a shot. That would have taken a long time to do though... Well, I can't expect you to do everything!

The preloader was funny, but got boring after a while. If you're replaying the game, you shouldn't have to watch it again, and again and again. It's really quite easy to pass. It takes like what. Three minutes on any difficulty? If you've played it as much as me anyway. For some reason, I find hard the easiest, and normal the hardest. I needed to use a continue! Easy was just fun, though I was on suprisingly low health at the end. Hard is definietly the easiest. For me anyway. Maybe it's all psychological? Uh, yeah. Ahem. Aaaaaanyway. There was a good amount of health. Not making it too easy, not marking it too hard. And that health line was an absolutely ingenious idea. If you think you've got too little health, just play it over and over again and you'll see how much you really have. Oh. And great work with that last fight. Very similar, and fantastic graphics.

And now three tips for gamers.
1. If you don't want to lose any health, just hold down spacebar and click the mouse like theirs no tomorrow.
2. If someone throws something at you, stop it at all costs! They're alot harder to shoot down then a normal stickman.
3. It's a game. Enjoy yourself, and don't try to win. Have fun.

~VelvetDarkRocks~

[Pencak Silat 2.1]

Great game. Last year, when I first played Pencak Silat, I thought it was both impossible and stupid. Now looking back and mastering the game, it's both challenging and original. The background music wasn't the best it could've been, but it was nice all the same. The character design was a brilliant idea, though some extra detail and outfits would've been nice. I don't know how to find the password codes things, but I experimented and found one of them was Jannata. Awww damn. I knew I had seen the codes last time I played from somewhere... Just read all of the authors comments! Oh well. I didn't really use the weapons much, except when I let my guard down and was defeated. Then I showed no mercy >-). Very creative, and highly addictive, though I don't see the point of passing all the levels. I think you get the Keris Sakti for free? Well, I didn't really use it anyway. I don't think you should have been able to use items on your brother though. That takes the challenge out of it. Other than that, I have no complaints, whatsoever. Fantastic job!!

~VelvetDarkRocks